Top Ten Reason Charlie Oredigger Is Single

There’s no doubt that our school’s fearless leader, Charlie Oredigger, is built like a brick house, has outstanding confidence, a commanding presence, and a fighting spirit. So why would a man with such knight-in-shining-armor qualities find himself single on Valentine’s Day? I’ve done some research on this perplexing issue, and I have discovered the top ten reasons why Charlie Oredigger is single (and perhaps many other engineers).

1. He will promise to take you out to a 7-course meal on your first date, which will turn out to be a pasty and a six-pack of beer.